Was melodramatic I know......but well I was upset. I don't have time to go into it now.....but I can't understand why my mother and Sonny don't want their kids to have full, rewarding and happy lives. Someone who is a total social misfit dominates Samantha's life and it's so sad for her, because she's a normal person and she said to him, "I don't want to be like you! I want to go out and have friends and have a normal life!" And what 19 year old wants to stay inside in the woods on a Saturday night and who in the Hamptons comes home at 2AM on Saturday? Mother herself was complaining to Donna last weekend that Sonny always goes out of his way to spoil anyone's good time, so why is she taking his side this time? Are they jealous? What is the point in being in the Hamptons if you're not part of the life? It's depressing going to Bridgehampton Polo and not being able to get into the VIP tent and finally I meet someone who I get along with and who CAN introduce us to the life and Mother and Sonny have to nearly permanently sabotage it and I can only pray, pray to whoever's out there who can help, that those people aren't alienated. Sonny is truly scary and he made a nasty scene showing up in the parking lot and yelling and them calling our phones Sam's only hope is to strike out on her own and sadly there are limited ways of doing that.
I really feel for Sam. They did this same thing to me when I was sixteen, expecting me to sit alone in that house with no friends in the woods.....no wonder I revolted,and was afraid of the country. Mother would flip out at me alone in that house and even attack me.....and it was all chalked up to her being distressed at recent bad events but the time has way passed and she hasn't changed. She talks about Grandpa having borderline personality disorder but I say she has the same, and I could have gone that way also.
That said,though,I beg whoever is out there for a second chance with V and these people because I believe wholeheartedly in the nightlife/club/techno scene and I believe it's right--I mean it's so hard to explain but I just know I'm doing the right thing here-- and I know bad stuff happens but I don't want to ever be told not to dance!
I believe,with no doubt whatsoever, that I did the right thing by befriending V and those people and that Sam did the right thing also and that Mother and Sonny are wrong. They get this way whenever we try to be social. They got mad at Al when he came out and my friend Jane.
It's a lost cause.....you can't be with certain people hoping for the best because it's not in them to be constructive: they won't change. From now on I'm on my own out there, and Sam too.
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