oh lovelies

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Hail to Thee Mighty Aphrodite!

Hail to Thee Mighty Aphrodite! Ancient Goddess of love, marriage, sex, prostitution, pornography, beauty, femininity.......
The most popular, most (probably) beloved diety ever. I've been meditating on her and writing about her in more private diaries quite extensively as of late.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Ancestral searches

Found this memoir, really an interview that was subsequently transcribed, of a woman named Jesse Gilbert Saiter who is not related to me, but was married to a man who was probably a distant cousin of my grandparents, something like that. It's an amazing story I haven't read it all but I plan to. That and collect information of early European-American history out in the plains; in my family there's quite a lot of that, on both sides.

This interview was done almost 30 years ago.....it could have been completely lost and thanks to Illinois Digital Archives and the libraries there it was all preserved. Kudos to these!

This all came about pretty much out of the blue and randomly as for the hell of it I did a google search on Saiter, Illinois, after reading this on Harry Middleton Hyatt anyway like I said there is SO much out there and so much history in any place crazy huh?

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Brooklyn Life

I'm not the first person to write about this and won't be the last. But life here in the early 0s, in Brooklyn. Coffee shops and bike/dog culture. And black. Ha. I'm sitting in the very cute little combination Thai/Hippie/Yuppie establishment called Rice on biscuits and Washington Park. Earlier I was at a place called Brooklyn Express coffee shop of something like that on Dekalb....where I was walking Tundra, Garrett's dog, until the owner came out and yelled at me about grooming Tundra who was shedding a storm cloud of fur in front of his "place of business" like I was some kind of criminal. Well I AM his business, I paid for my coffee. And dog biscuits which they were selling.....plus they had a bowl of water on the sidewalk for dogs. Tundra actually led me there.....there was this kind of dyky punk woman working there....a nice break from the otherwise bland upper middle class people in this area......I bought my latte and biscuits ect then I had taken this metal thing you brush fur off with....and Tundra was shedding so much it got in my mouth everywhere......so this owner.....a tall muscular African American guy....came out and was saying he appreciates me cleaning it the fur is going into his shop ect. This is what I have to deal with every morning. I am used to being able to start my day with coffee at least and a little down time but I get none now. The dog has to go out and I won't get into her going to the bathroom everywhere. And I mean everywhere. Mornings are very stressful as is this situation.

But that said, I'm sitting in this Rice place....despite the fact that I got into an argument with these people sitting outside yesterday again over Tundra who I won't get into it cause I'm about to eat. But the music is very nice reminds me of this Brazilian music my boyfriend's ex wife sang...which he played for me. In a bizarre way I'm very inspired by this....and this is helping me. It's very soft and dreamy.......unreal, almost like fairies singing. I am very moved by all this fairy talk I think it's awesome.....whether they're "real" or not isn't the point.....your art becomes life. Fairies and demons. A little better. A little.

Friday, September 03, 2010

written sometime in may this year

I've never been near a volcano or seen lava
once I tried to make one
exploded all over the kitchen
Mother home from work and screamed raged
formidable beast of flower no end to it
am I a brat
patience is evil
I am a bitch
I hate myself Amen
what a cruel game
what a cruel joke that was
what a cruel world
joke's not funny anymore it was on us
love is a knife
love is jealousy slowly cutting
eating away at your life
needing revenge
the fog, the ugliness of it all away all away

Thursday, September 02, 2010


My mother has this book of international literature and among them is the Qu'ran. I am very very enraged at reading this to the point where I am ready to ......go crazy. It makes sense in the worst way. The constant phrase "God is merciful" then telling people God will throw people into hell fire for all eternity if they don't believe in "Him" that women have no rights and if you're a slave you're really SOL. All this because this is how "God" wants it. Uh, not to bash anyone's beliefs but....I'm bashing them. I don't discriminate against Muslims no that's not right I am against that. I do have major issues with the religion. I'm trying to put it out of my mind. Is this how all men think, just they don't publicly say it cause they can't anymore? You can't marry a woman plus her sister, in case that's what you were planning on doing. Sorry for the letdown. You can't marry your stepdaughter. Guess Woody Allen would not be accepted there, he's going to hell according to them. God is merciful. What can I say? Well, these are my opinions. Maybe I'm "ignorant" well be they as they are this is what I feel; so far what I"ve read makes me against this belief. Have to say it.