oh lovelies

Saturday, May 19, 2012


I was thinking a lot on this subject...have been for a time now.....science vs. spirituality and art and that they're not opposed to each other. I have a conviction that they're not......though; science certainly blew the lid off many religious themes like creation. Oops, the universe is older than 7,000 years. The world was not created in seven days. However.....in these themes is a pattern anyone, at least one of seven, thank you very much, which is my number, as my birthday is July (the seventh month) 25, which adds up to seven. The autobiography of Malcolm X also stresses this number. More on that later. An amazing book. So.....there's a contradiction.....a grey area that's neither here nor there. Some is right some is not. I personally don't follow the creation story because I see it as being derived from older religions and their stories......same as the Noah's ark is similar enough to the Gilgamesh story.....

Science is based on the facts, hard science. Well and good. On some very personal topics which I'm reluctant to write about here.....there's a misperception that one has to believe in them. I'm basing this on some youtube videos by Venus Satanas. But experience with something, seeing, feeling, knowing.....is not believing in it. Something happened and that's factual, it's not something you dreamed up.......belief to me is.....you read about or hear about something, you like the way it sounds, so you decide to live your life as if it's real, without it being proven to you. Belief can be a wonderful thing and not anything to shun.....as your imagination and emotions take over and create a brilliant exuberant experience.....but I can't use that as a foundation for something. ANYWAY......science has, from the beginning, been twisted to justify oppressive systems in society. Namely sexism and racism. Evolutionary psychology.....there's good and bad in everything....but in the worst scenarios what was somebody's generalization and personal opinion of how or why something happened is misinterpreted as fact, this in popular media and often in school. Being in a school library....seeing the things they're studying.....we can't say there hasn't been some progress.

Believe it or not, this is an excerpt from a textbook that was taught to college girls in the 1950s....this was presented as fact, dare I say science? Well, sociology. Again....a nebulous area.

Excerpted from The Feminine Mystique....originally a book called Marriage for Moderns. This was taught in COLLEGE.

  The sexes are complementary. It is the works of my watch that move the hands to enable me to tell time......Together they form a functioning unit. 

It goes on in this vein......clearly a person's opinion presented as hard unquestionable truth. Imagine going to school, a prestigious one like Smith or Barnard, paying the tuition, and this being taught. But wait, it gets better. 

To talk about what would happen  if tradition and the mores were radically changed or what may come about by the year 2000 may be interesting mental gymnastics, but it does not help the young people of today to adjust to the inevitables of life or raise their marriages to a higher plane of satisfaction. 

 Well, it's 2012 and in many ways the mores have been radically changed. Ironically, adjusting to the inevitables of life didn't prepare them for what became more than "interesting mental gymnastics" .....
There's more.

For the first time in history, American young women in great numbers are being faced with these questions: shall I voluntarily prepare myself for a lifelong, celibate career? Or shall I prepare myself for a temporary vocation.....

Can you imagine this? Going to school and this is your curriculum......TFM said this was taught for twenty years, probably more than that....in COLLEGE.  I know I'm going on a rant...another....but there are people who want to go BACK to this.


Friday, May 18, 2012

Falco - Rock Me Amadeus

   Austrian hip hop ca 1984....didn't know it existed? From what I can decipher....the opening line is "he was a punk and he lived in the big city" "he was Viennese, was Vienna" ......the past meets the then present.....Falco is an icon in Austria ....he passed away a few years ago.

The opening line of the film, based on the play, is "Mozart, I killed you I confess....." I was really into this film (based on the play by Peter Shaffer, which I also saw)  ....Elizabeth Berrige was pretty miscast and got quite a lot of criticism....she was cute but not very believable as an 18th century Viennese (not Vietnamese....uh! almost said that) woman. Tom Hulce was very cute guess I'm not the only one who thinks so from the YouTube comments!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

clothes washed

I ran for an hour...came back and did a ton of laundry. it's tedious but purifying.....had to wash off all the confusion of the past few days.

tried so hard

I tried so hard to suppress it. But it couldn't be......something, something happened. As much as I'd try to forget.....forget it would creep back into my thoughts. He would. What he thought, or knew.....he seemed to know more than he was telling me.

This happened at ......just a few blocks away, same time, Obama was giving a speech to Barnard. That would solidify the events in my mind......the meaning of this? If there are no coincidences.....


He had fangs....real fangs! Are those implants? I asked....no....they were real; he was born with them. And green eyes. Is that .....

Friday, May 11, 2012

for my own mistakes I'm sorry


I accept responsibility. 

But by banishing what was hurting me in so many ways.....the horizon is brighter and clearer....the better for me to see and correct it all. Freedom! It's no small thing.

to say worse

if you have to go to these lengths  to keep a man who has told you repeatedly it's over, for two, three years...what has it been? You are truly pathetic and desperate!

will write more later when I have time

of the many awful sites I saw on my way up here....what's happened to this city?......was her name . any deviation or anything derived. it was that in conjunction with construction sites with ugly scaffolding, ladders being taped off, stuff falling off buildings (a danger to everyone in the area) ugh a horror, through and through! She's gone and ties are being severed everywhere......it's her fault alone. She's an obsessive, evil and hate-filled maniac and it shows as her cover blows apart, finally. To those who know, you know whom I am speaking of, and soon the world will know as well.Or rather, will they forget? I'd say to those who are her friends, I can only suggest you find better company. Don't give your attention, money or kudos to those whose lives and motivations center around causing innocent people harm in order to aggrandize themselves......simply earning credit where it isn't due. Give instead to those who are making a heartfelt contribution to the world creatively. Fakes, thieves and emotional vampires (not meant an any way complimentary) should be left on the sidelines, rightly, where they can't cause any more damage than they have.

Naked Juice

This is coming across as a plug....I don't mean it to be. But I'm turning to these they're awesome.....full of vitamins B and C....if your life is super active like mine....I do NOT advocate fasting with only these though as some are doing. That's just insanity!

Tuesday, May 08, 2012

cat adopts rabbit


on the up side

That which hurt me so devastatingly in the past few years is GONE! I'm free now!

First trip anywhere in ages...to the midwest and life and .....so much is brilliant and lit up and in front of me. And it's ......what words? Freedom!

OK, on to better things

I apologize for being so grim, but I was forced to face this ugly issue that will soon, thank god, fall into the wasteland and decay and be gone. This person is getting hit hard and nasty, but she only is getting what she did to others. Sorry, but it's deserved. This is someone who out of resentment of me and obsession did everything she could to interfere in my life, my relationships and art and attacked me (not to my face, the coward) behind my back assuming I'd never know. Well, you will never do anything to me that I will not find out about. This is someone who entitled herself to a special place in the world that no one else is allowed to be in. Me being among those she put me (wrongly) with, some other ?????, I somehow am not entitled to own my own work, my own money, my own fame, my own life.....my home. It all belongs to her, so she thinks. Obviously, those ideas are false she does not, never has and never will have any right to anything I produce or anything in my life. She thinks the world will never catch up with her. Again, she's wrong. But she's the one who has to look in the mirror (and I shudder to think what a scary experience that is) and face herself alone.......and then the rest. Sad to watch, but she had it coming.

Sometimes a person has everything in this world going for them but they still take a tumble down and you wonder why.....who knows only I can think maybe there are other things at work (like the fact that you suck, among other things).


may I never see that wretched, horrifying name or face ever again.


unfortunately there are those who are resentful and envious of me and my work and my love life. jealousy combined with mental illness and an evil persona that sadly seems to know no limits. you can never defend your actions. you who came between me and my beloved, me and my art, me and my family.....it hurts to write this but the world needs to know that you're an evil being. people need to get out of their denial. because they are the equivalent of the parent who denies there's sexual abuse happening, or blame the child victim. You're no better.......so change already, while you can redeem yourself.


You seem like such an awesome place can't wait to get my passport back and visit you!

Monday, May 07, 2012


I love these candles you find in Latin bodegas you find mostly in Brooklyn.....but there's one in Jersey City that I found, since I moved there.....there's something very poetic and moving in them.

Friday, May 04, 2012

New art work by Laura Saiter

"I'll be a girl 
backstage at your show
velvet ropes and guitars 
cause you're more rock star
between the sets 
eyeliner and cigarettes

shadow is burnt 
yellow dance and we turn 
my lashes are dry 
purple teardrops I cry 
it don't have a price .....

I'm your biggest fan 
I'll follow you until you love me
papa paparazzi....."

as sung by Lady Gaga 
words not mine.....

Well this is what you can do with some markers, glitter nail polish, white drawing paper gotten from Duane Reade and the 99cent (can't find that stupid sign argh!) store.....I love it. The one on the bottom is much better as an original....it shines......

Thursday, May 03, 2012

AMADEUS part 1

chastity....small price to pay for fame!


After a really rough morning and week that nearly shattered me (thank you to all who have been supportive of me during the ongoing issues with some people--really I don't act grateful but I am absolutely) ....this was a great comic relief. In the UK people are more willing to get crazy and daring with fashion and I love that!

Tuesday, May 01, 2012

My marker art

I did this this AM on the train! Only thing is, the colors are far more intense in my original.....


    I know another You tube clip.....but I forgot how much I LOVE this film!