oh lovelies

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Illegal spying on and harassment of bloggers

I don't enjoy writing about these things but it has come out that cointelpro style attacks are being committed along with illegal spying on people who voice their grievances over various social and political issues like I have done. I know about this very well as my suspicions have been proven true. I am one of those people who was unjustly targeted but I want to emphasize this did NOT begin with Obama this occurred during the Bush years. The level of nastiness and petty meanness is stunning. I was targeted by the IRS and I am not a conservative. Nor am I imagining this this is very real as conversations I had privately were repeated verbatim at so called improv shows among other places. Damn right this is criminal activity. This is also why I am avoiding protests and other things I did like radical cheerleading which was creative performance art .....nothing more yet the level of bitchiness and backstabbing I mean .....you think junior high was bad! The spying and wiretapping have been outed and can't be refuted. Much of this was commissioned (illegally) not necessarily by government but by people with money to pay private investigators and hackers because that too happened to me. My friends and I were followed and some dirty lowlife hacked into my emails and, under my name and email address, sent my friend a message asking her if anyone touched her inappropriately "while we were growing up." They also sent nude webcam photos of me to family members. Of course this was not consented to by me nor would I do anything so ridiculous and sick as to send racy photos of myself to my mother and sister and friend. My friend caught the sick email asking if she molested "while we were growing up" when she said we didn't grow up together and alerted me to what happened. She also got an email from my address by this same person pretending to be me asking if she wanted to come party with me and a friend I'm withholding specifics but I asked this friend if he got into my account and wrote this (I did suspect him to be honest as this person had done things in the past that were hurtful to me as well as threatened me, this a him) to her; and he emphatically denied doing it. I did not write these emails that should go without saying, the person I suspected said he didn't do this but obviously someone did and if .....or some such I want to get to the bottom of this as this is very malicious and not an accident. This female friend who got this message  sent a reply saying this is not Laura whoever you are.  Who ever wrote this fraudulent email under my name  apparently confused my friend for my sister. Look I don't know who wrote that message this nor do I want anyone who would do this kind of thing, whoever they are, in my life but when I got attacked I mentioned what happened to the people handling my case as this goes beyond merely a prank this is someone who, even if he or she mixed my sister and friend up, knows I have a sister and other details about my life. When these emails were sent, the one to my friend during the spring, I was at a friend's house in Manhattan, asleep and my phone was charging. I wasn't on the computer or phone at the time. I woke up a couple hours later and saw the replies from my friend which mentioned this message. The nude webcam pictures were sent to my sister a few years ago when I was living in Jersey City. Someone recorded me without my knowledge or permission and sent footage to her.
Around the year 2006, this occurring before what I just talked about.....sorry for the confusion as I'm writing this on my phone trying to get this all down; the repetition of private conversations with my friend in performances I went to, not to mention ripoffs of our ideas, and petty meanness toward me from the IRS and taxing of my 401k, I mean considering this was all the money I had since I wasn't working and had to pay rent I think it was unfair and wrong: that is my opinion. It's not like I was hiding millions of American dollars in an offshore account like I've since found out a number of well known and established people are. I'm not some kind of sleaze trying to take advantage of the system or cheat the government.
Ok; point number ? Another thing: The plagiarism of my words, things I said in an interview with the RCs for Glamour Magazine,  and fraudulent attribution of things I said during this interview, to another person involved, I'm keeping names out for now and for a long time I wasn't going to say anything you know I thought should I let this go or what; but no because it's fucking wrong; I deserve credit for my own intelligence and thoughts, and considering at my job I had been told I haven't "proved myself" as having ability to write and report news and well here's your proof but it's under someone else's name, even though they never said this I did; this  occurred ten years ago and Obama was not president then, Bush was. I want to state this:  I did not write the cheers I performed what was   the consensus at protests and it was FUNNY. I never said I hate Bush or Obama I am not a hateful person. I am an artist and writer. I did because I wasn't working my father had just died and there was no money, I was kicked out of my place and needed to get on my feet, fast. What else was I supposed to do? I mean, no one was paying my way though some people helped and I am grateful for that. But there was no ok some other time for this..... I struggled worked my ass off and dug myself out of a grave so in my opinion why should I apologize? This Glamour Magazine article was written by Liz Scarf and published in the UK and according to the RC website this writer did not fact check and that includes verifying who said what. Journalism 101 I did work in the news says fact check. Look I'm not trying to pontificate but I have to say I find it hypocritical how power was thrown in my face accusing me of being inept at newswriting yet this occurs in Glamour Magazine a major publication by someone put in a position to do this and who was paid by them--but these aren't minor slips these a glaring errors. There's no excuse for not getting this straight. Furthermore, others were quoted as saying things they never said. And quite honestly, people who do this are really not in a position to tell me I'm not good enough to write or haven't proved myself. They run in the same circles.
Another thing; in light of the revelations that Verizon assisted in government spying I was using Verizon at the time this happened; this all around the years 2004-2005  who also tried to overcharge me. A strange man showed up at my door one time saying he was there to "check the meter" and his vibe rubbed me the wrong way. He was very menacing.   Another time during the RNC protests a chopper was hovering over my apartment. Call it what you want whatever it was but I have seen the spy equipment as a store in my neighborhood sells it and friends told me privately that they knew people who were doing this and following me and neighbors around in cars. Not to mention unusually high numbers of hits on a poetry page I posted I mean this is all verifiable I'm not dreaming it, dude. I had mentioned to some other activists that there was spying and one of them was dismissive of me. She went to the DNC to RNC march and complained in an email how it had all turned to crap. Later, an Indymedia article outed one girl as an undercover who went to this march and was involved in at least one setup that landed a 18 year old kid in jail, for a scheme to blow up a building which in fact she had instigated (Anna Davies I believe is her name). This kid in my opinion was not too bright and I personally don't condone, nor have I ever, blowing up buildings. I watched the towers fall at my former job and witnessed several people having nervous breakdowns from the trauma of being near the scene or witnessing it during the Sept. 11 attacks. In short, I am not violent and not a terrorist nor have I ever been. I spoke up about street harassment. I have had my verbal fight but I don't set out to hurt people and never had. I wrote, I danced, I was silly at times.....but I am not an enemy of the state or a dangerous insurgent and therefore spying on me, probably done without a warrant because there's nothing to warrant, is completely unjust. Ditto the other attacks on me. When I saw that spy store, I said people who thought I was paranoid, I wonder who taught them to think. Check out the film "Alone with Her" it's brilliant.   
The fact that some one has a personal vendetta against someone, criticizes them or questions what they do or say,  disagrees with them, speaks out against political oppression, or because they see another person an an artistic or career rival who may steal the spotlight or some such thing from them, is not justification for malicious personal attacks or invading their privacy,  or spying on them. Yet this is what happened. This did not begin with Obama and I've never publicly said anything bad about him, I've never incited anyone to violence nor am I a declared enemy of the government, or anybody. I've never been arrested. I write and perform and that was apparently the raison d'etre (forgive me for not accenting that properly this is not on my keypad) for my phones computers and emails intercepted as well as wiretaps well it occurred somewhere. Ask my friends if you don't believe me.

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Clip from Rod Stewart "Infatuation"

Voyeurism aka pervert law

that's right tear them a new one! ha     


Wednesday, October 21, 2015

deli cats and Lisbeth Salandar

Bodega cats are usually very friendly and sociable as they are used to being around people.....I've gotten to know a few of them. I just love these little guys to pieces.
Sorry to take so long to update I had my phone stolen last week and no computer. What kept me sane was reading Stieg Larsson's Girl With the Dragon Tattoo love it love Lisbeth.....  

Tuesday, October 06, 2015

Pussy Riot with a few additional words a year later

 OK I'm adding a little to this: 

A part of me can empathize with what these girls went through. 

Billy Idol's ex was  a friend of some friends of mine. Her name was Spike, and she did have real talent. A few years ago, not sure......or? recently she was run over. She showed up at my friend's door that night.....rang the buzzer.....then......

ooh. ooh.

Watching a documentary on them that a friend gave me.....reminds me a little of the radical cheerleader days. Also what I read of the British Suffragists: "You have to make more noise than anybody else  you have to fill the papers more than anybody else.....if you want to get your reform realized." Emmaline Pankhurst. I watch this with a grain of salt as I.am not over there (but what is this: a country so allegedly poor but even in Communist days the women were dressed like they stepped out of  Vogue and punk rock and everything.....black market, in America it was called "bootlegging" .....and now their trains look spotless, comfortable and pretty.....but? What do I know.....) I am ignorant as to what Putin has done.....and.....but to stage a protest performance like this I know is a lot of work.....but somewhere too this was being documented as well.....their families interviewed. In the Bush days there were massive protests in every American city ironically his presidency was the catalyst for so much great music art film.....not to mention the loss of our privacy and freedom (that did NOT start with Obama) and mine in a devastating way. This kind of public insurgency isn't new either.....for so long I have avoided writing about this and stayed away from occupy wall street because I felt I would express my .....? I found other methods of it. And did not want to get arrested, thank you. I have known of people in and out of jail (cat and mouse, Pankhurst said.....anyway. It is very disturbing to think about. I watched a youtube clipped of a Ukrainian protester being.....or having been tortured.....Awful stuff.....
Anyway. I was raised in a secular non religious environment in Chicago and New York with divorced parents and went to "nice liberal" Episcopal churches Diana Vera wrote about with female ministers and gay married couples...) so I personally never felt any kind of.....moral fear that I suppose a lot of people are raised with..... though I was told a lot of brain damaging psychobabble by faux New Age gurus but that's another story. Personally although I don't believe what Pussy Riot did in the cathedral was terribly tasteful but I can understand why they did it.....why they are angry. These women.girls have.....how do I say it? I can feel deeply for anyone who puts them self on the line and out of a comfort spot to raise an issue and speak out against a wrong or for what they feel is urgently necessary and impossible to ignore. . I know too well the lies and denial young women are fed day after day even by other women.....and make no mistake they ARE lies.....suck it up, be grateful, shut your mouth.....and things I have been told others were raised with that are so preposterous it's hard to believe but I heard it from more than one source.....

" Last night a little dancer came dancin' to my door
Last night a little angel Came pumpin cross my floor
She said "Come on baby I got a licence for love
And if it expires pray help from above" 

I'd sell my soul for you babe
For money to burn with you
I'd give you all, and have none, babe
Just, just, justa, justa to have you here by me

 Rebel Yell/Billy Idol

"Prom Night" more on

"A cake of soap. A wedding ring. A gold filling." 
Sylvia Plath

As Halloween is approaching and I love this holiday it's my favorite: plan to really do this (suggestions? I love the skulls at Walgreens and .....oh wait a minute every day of my life is this 365 but on this time, Sun in Scorpio, it's official. Skulls are protection: the spirits of the dead (esp. your kin) can cover your ass so be nice to them......
So I never went to prom. I went to a succession of "alternative" high schools one for geniuses another for fucked up kids in Chicago, where they just wanted you to graduate, period. I suppose better than GED or .....there I met my nemesis, Krystal Hunt, who attacked me when I was seven years old. "Still weird....." she said. We recognized each other. I saw some .....ok I'll keep it civil.....this woman who approached me smiled at me.....I just got the wrong vibe from her. "Remember me from junior high?" No, thank fuck. I've blocked it out, including you. I didn't have breakfast yet, though maybe that added to my irritability. A part of me thinks, time goes by forgive and forget. The problem is people don't well whatever. At the time I was enraged, you know, but what can you do? Yeah, so Krystal Hunt, when we were seven, we're friends now I'm sorry  when we were a few blocks away from school I knew it was coming so I was prepared. She dropped her act and attacked me, again. What makes people think I'm so naive and dumb I won't see through an obvious act? "One may smile and be a villain....." (Hamlet) [citation] I knew that then. I ..... animals they know danger when it's approaching "I walk through the shadow of death" "You want to put me back in Stillwater?" (Fargo) yet I went so I have to at least accept .....but I survived. Wouldn't be the last time. ..... call it transference projection what have you something to discuss with my shrink but can't stop it just grips me and I can't get over it, it won't leave my mind, never, it can't I close my eyes he's there open them he's there even when he isn't.....he's always with me always next to me can almost feel his breath on my neck, or in my ear.....

"I may be skin and bone. I may be Japanese." Plath

  So eight years old visiting family in Michigan and my aunt, who was closer in age to me than my mom and a teenager then, took me under her wing and introduced me to her high school friends this was the era of bands like Foreigner or a few years after  ..... me, age eight or so, my aunt, who was maybe fifteen, her guy friends one of them Brent, I think his name was.....we're driving through Michigan, this Battle Creek, a --if you've never been there you're in for something if you decide to visit. I don't even know how to describe it.....the whole state is very lonely with extremes of weather hot that burns you pink in minutes and bone-stabbing cold..... and the feeling is as if you were on the moon, or a deserted carnival.....I haven't been everywhere but even taking a cab through what was the remains of Taba in Egypt after it was bombed .....it's as if the oxygen and any signs of life human warmth or souls have been sucked out......that's Battle Creek.....through the trees and the sky black, at night, summer, through some stone tunnel or something like that......like you see in Central Park. Mary says, "I'll bet someone was murdered in here" too close to the probable truth because this tunnel was a real horror show.....or something out of an Edgar Allen Poe story. On our way to the movies. We went to McDonalds where I was dying to try the orange shake.....Brent said, "That looks like pus." (piss? pus....piss pus, pus) Me: "What is pus?" "When you pop your pimples....." Pimples maybe I remembered.....so we got to the theater where "Prom Night" is showing (what is prom) last scene the story difficult to follow (motivation, goo.....avenging his sister's death) "kill kill kill.....!" My aunt used to call me "cuds" though I didn't know what that meant.....I went out of the theater to get soda couldn't return it went back in bloody hands out of the ceiling girl alone in a locker room young couple making out in a camper, in the woods, and we were in the woods. My friend once told me the city is safer. It is. Where will you run in the woods who can you call there are no pay phones.....at the end the head in a ski mask, minus the rest of him, is on the floor the mask comes off and that was my first severed head. Later.....a few years, age twelve, our class was shown a film on the French Revolution even now thinking about it makes me sick.
So maybe it was a subconscious thing but I never went to prom even if it was .....but, shrug. I went to shows. Punk bands. Red Hot Chili Peppers once in Brooklyn and once in Chicago even if .....the crowd there was rough even more than the skinheads I came back from that show in Chicago where I was front row with bruises on both hips. My dad was driving me to the show and we couldn't find the tickets later Dad found them "they were in the litter box" .....a girl friend of mine had a thing with Anthony Keidis even though he had a gf and .....the wall had been cracked the Cold War was ending and I was in ice. I didn't want to leave my friends my life where I was happy but I was not really .....I had to....."yes yes herr professor it is I" Sylvia Plath