Why do these things come in a flash? I have to take time out of my day to write it as it comes.......despite my busy schedule. But so it is. I don't even like to read though I do.....not enough. Lately my reading has been online and youtube videos. I read people's everyday testimonies rather than Camut who my sister reads. I have read Simone de Beauvoir though and she wrote about the "ennui" that engulfs Hollywood among other places and the atmosphere of boredom I mean this is her not me. But I felt that immediately watching these videos. The objectification of people and obsession with things like cars which like humans fall prey to thermodynamics inevitably. So.....I'm just not materialistic and the people I know who are I wish I did not know. I have never met a person obsessed with objects who did not also have a serial killer mentality not to mention a complete lack of morals. Not saying don't have nice stuff or have nothing but to have something to apply to good use in your life is one thing. To have it just to have it is a way of hiding something. Anyway......maybe that's a telling thing right there. I watched part of a French film La Ceremonies which speaks of the same atmosphere of boredom in the French bourgeoisie which drives two female servants to senseless killing so it isn't just America. Still......facts be told if he shot himself in his car why is the window broken and nearly gone and there no blood? There should be blood everywhere. Even in the videos there is a glare of sunlight on the screen it could be reflecting from the camera lens but it looks like a window reflection. So.....this is my take so far.