oh lovelies

Monday, March 30, 2015

Divine Miss M 1953

"It was a queer, sultry summer, the summer they executed the Rosenbergs, and I didn't know what I was doing in New York. I'm stupid about executions. The idea of being electrocuted makes me sick, and that's all there was to read about in the papers -- goggle-eyed headlines staring up at me at every street corner and at the fusty, peanut-smelling mouth of every subway. It had nothing to do with me, but I couldn't help wondering what it would be like, being burned alive all along your nerves.

I thought it must be the worst thing in the world."  Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar

"I'm worst at what I do best
and for this gift I feel blessed
our little group has always been
and always will until the end"
Nirvana Smells Like Teen Spirit

I wasn't born yet but these numbers keep bouncing out at me 1953 adds to 9......

Kurt Cobain allegedly escaped rehab (do they lock you in there or what?) made his way back to his house, broke into his own tool shed where he had a shotgun and blew his own brains out. So goes the story. To be honest, I was never much of a fan of them, or that scene. However, this whole episode year after year remains an open wound that grows more and more infected.....and unanswered. Too little credit was given to so many punk bands before and since. But some other time for that. This story is bizarrely, inexplicably similar to one that had happened among unrelated people that had been close to me, in my own life, another time. Almost the same story, and though it was so long ago so much of it may have just occurred it's that fresh and that raw. The Rosenbergs were alleged spies and that's about all I know of them. Except that they were publicly executed what is this sick desire in humans to see what they think is their enemy die, in a humiliating way......like a performance? This person is your "other" your Adversary, everything evil in the world.....by getting rid of them you are getting rid of evil. But then it comes back. My friend once said "you can't fight guerrilla warfare....." Another friend once said that if people could see from beginning to end what really happens to a human being in an execution they would not be in favor. I read The Executioner's Song by Norman Mailer as a teenager.....a haunting and disturbing but incredible story, about Gary Gilmore.  The way a human cadaver is spliced up dissected and different bits and pieces of the brain, this gland that gland, this that organ, liver, kidneys, stomach, ect....... like any meat at the butchers so much more reason to be a vegan n'est-ce pas? Being written about in the coroner's journal like you are a broken dishwasher.

"they had to call and call
and pick the worms off me like sticky pearls"

Sylvia Plath

you wouldn't recognize much because what was your way was done away with. you may have been the reason for that, you an example of what was wrong with it. but your baby lived. he was born to someone else, somewhere else, but he is your soul child.
you'd be pleased, if maybe somewhat alienated. these were different times. The sun was in Taurus, the bull. Moon in Scorpio.

 Sylvia Plath was electrocuted by ECT in late July 1953 near my birthday, but before I was born.

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