oh lovelies

Saturday, August 16, 2008

disregard the last entry

I guess I was in one of those moods. I'm having problems, major ones, with the same person I wrote about before. He smoked a cigarette and joint, and I don't care if they do, it's friday night/sat morning.....if it's out the window or on the fire escape even. I've done that. But it was in his room, and it all drifted from his to mine through a very thin wall and I was asphyxiated by it, plus getting a migraine. This is all after I'd suffered a major anxiety attack. A terrible one. I was doing my breathing and stretching when he did this. This is why I was so mad. It couldn't have happened at a worse time. And stuff like this just...I don't want to become a hateful person. Or bitter. But this kind of thing...this general meanness and lack of caring for others, from people like him, make me lose sympathy.
On a better note, I made some money at work. After busting my ass and going through hell and back. I saw a black cat cross the road. That's good or bad luck depending where you are. I see it as an omen, or some kind of angel....if it goes away from you it's seen as bad and toward you it's good. It ran into someone's front yard. I went there, sat on the sidewalk, and waited for it, and he came out. He looked at me, he was wild, with his big sea green eyes, kind face. Then the owner of the building came out, and the cat took off.
There were these very scary people, junkies, in the store I was coming from. I was afraid they'd follow me. There must be a solution, to all this.

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